{"id":1924,"date":"2023-01-27T19:54:16","date_gmt":"2023-01-28T03:54:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/billyketchallen.com\/?p=1924"},"modified":"2024-08-25T00:45:25","modified_gmt":"2024-08-25T00:45:25","slug":"inner-knight-team-read","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/billyketchallen.com\/?p=1924","title":{"rendered":"Inner Knight Team Read"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Although it\u2019s a story anyone can enjoy, The Inner Knight: Train and Compete Like a Champion<\/a><\/em> was written for athletes and coaches. So it\u2019s exciting when a team reads it together as Loyola Marymount\u2019s beach volleyball team did over winter break. I had the opportunity to visit and talk to them about the book.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It was fun answering questions and seeing players dig into the book. It’s exciting how fiction can resonate in ways a coaching textbook doesn\u2019t. As the lead character Meridian Kay says about the power of stories, \u201cThey stay with us, their lessons burrowing a home in our hearts.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While visiting LMU, I stayed with their head coach, my friend John Mayer. He was reading The Inner Knight<\/em> to his nine-year-old daughter at bedtime, and I got to listen in. Maybe it was just his amazing voice work, but it was cool hearing the book read aloud and the characters come to life. Here is a section they read from the chapter on Mindfulness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Since it\u2019s from the middle of the book there are minor spoilers, so maybe skip it if you want to go into the story completely blind.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

It was late afternoon. We sat on the porch, having finished our daily practice reflection. \u201cYou\u2019re showing remarkable improvement,\u201d Gowyn said afterward. \u201cAnd you look more comfortable in your armor.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I shook my head. \u201cI think I\u2019m just getting used to being uncomfortable.\u201d I sat silently, watching Shadow eat from his trough.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s on your mind, Meridian?\u201d Gowyn asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThe tournament,\u201d I said with a sigh. \u201cI know I\u2019m getting better, but I still feel so nervous.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt helps to be mindful of your feelings.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat does mindful mean?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cMindfulness is being fully present, aware of what you\u2019re doing, thinking, sensing, or feeling in the moment. And presence is the key to performance.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI don\u2019t understand. How does being present help you joust?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cA joust is won or lost in the blink of an eye. You can\u2019t perform your best when your head is somewhere else.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I was reminded of my father\u2019s words: Keep your head and your feet in the same place.<\/em> He\u2019d talked about how a knight had to be mentally strong, but he never explained how to develop that strength. Did Gowyn know?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow does mindfulness help?\u201d I asked. \u201cWill it stop nerves and negative thoughts?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gowyn shook his head. \u201cThink of your attention like a boat, and your mind is the ocean. The ocean is always producing waves in the form of thoughts and feelings. Sometimes the waves are gentle. Sometimes they become a storm and crash into the boat. You can\u2019t stop the waves, but you can set an anchor so they don\u2019t knock you too far off course. That is the practice of mindfulness, and you can strengthen it like any other skill.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow do I practice?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cBy being aware of the thoughts and feelings you\u2019re experiencing, without judgment. Simply note them and let them pass.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat if they don\u2019t pass?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cLet\u2019s try an exercise.\u201d Gowyn sat up straight and rested his hands in his lap. \u201cClose your eyes.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I followed his example and closed my eyes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNow, listen to the waves. When you feel a thought or feeling, note it aloud. There is no wrong answer. There is no judgement. Simply acknowledge what you feel in the present moment.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I sighed, stirring uncomfortably in the silence. I felt foolish sitting there with my eyes closed. What was I supposed to say?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Then came Gowyn\u2019s calm voice. \u201cThere is anticipation.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gowyn continued noting his feelings aloud in a detached voice. There was a pause between each, like waves receding. \u201cThere is patience . . . There is concern.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My pulse quickened. I didn\u2019t feel comfortable opening up. I would rather get hit with the sandbag than share my feelings. I thought about quitting the exercise and then remembered my oath. If this could make me a better jouster, I\u2019d give it a try.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My first impulse was to make up something, to say what a brave knight should feel. Instead, I admitted what I really felt: \u201cThere is discomfort.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gowyn exhaled. \u201cThere is understanding.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I took a deep breath and listened to my mind, noting feelings as they came: \u201cThere is impatience . . . There is nervousness . . . There is calm.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

After a few minutes of noting, I opened my eyes and met Gowyn\u2019s gaze.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat did you notice?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhen I stopped worrying about what I should be feeling, it was easier to identify what I was feeling.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gowyn nodded. \u201cIt\u2019s easier to hear with a quiet mind. What else did you notice?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I thought back to the exercise, to the words I chose. \u201cThe feelings changed.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat does that tell you?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThat the feelings come and go. Like waves.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gowyn nodded. \u201cA feeling is temporary. You may feel nervous or confident in one moment, but that feeling passes. It doesn\u2019t control your actions.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cBut shouldn\u2019t a knight be confident all the time?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gowyn rubbed his beard. \u201cWhen I was younger, there was a knight in our realm who was renowned for his jousting. He was bigger and stronger than the other knights. His horse was faster. He went from town to town and never lost a duel. People believed he was unbeatable, himself most of all.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIn one town, his challenge was accepted by a boy who\u2019d just been knighted. Facing off against the fledgling knight, the champion had all the confidence in the world.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cBut he didn\u2019t win, did he?\u201d I said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gowyn shook his head. \u201cThe boy unhorsed him on the first pass.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I smiled. Though it wasn\u2019t my story, it made me feel that I too could overcome impossible odds.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat do you think the champion\u2019s feeling of confidence did for him?\u201d Gowyn asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt hurt him because he underestimated his opponent.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNow consider the boy. This was his first tournament. He was competing against a champion knight. He had no reason to be confident, yet he still won.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cSo, you don\u2019t need confidence to win.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cFeelings affect us because we\u2019re human, but they don\u2019t control us. We choose who we want to be.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gowyn turned and fixed his eyes on me. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cFeelings are fleeting, Meridian. Trust in your training. Trust in your process. Then ride. That\u2019s all a knight can do.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThe boy in the story,\u201d I said. \u201cThat was you, wasn\u2019t it?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gowyn smiled. \u201cYes.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWere you nervous?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gowyn chuckled. \u201cI was a mess. I threw up my breakfast in the stables before I rode out. Barely got my helmet off in time.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We both laughed, and I felt some of my unease slip away.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNo matter how many tournaments I won, I felt nervous before every duel,\u201d Gowyn said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou did?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt\u2019s natural to be nervous when the outcome is uncertain. To feel pressure simply means you care, that you\u2019re doing something important.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I smiled, feeling a rush of relief. The doubts I had were normal, and they didn\u2019t control me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I sat on Gowyn\u2019s porch, feeling my chest rise and fall with every breath. Since I\u2019d left home, hardly a moment went by when I didn\u2019t think about the tournament. But right now, I didn\u2019t want to look past this moment. I wanted my head right where my feet were.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThank you, Gowyn,\u201d I said. \u201cI\u2019m grateful to have you as my teacher.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gowyn raised an eyebrow. \u201cThere is vulnerability. We must be making progress.\u201d We both laughed. \u201cHow would you feel about continuing the exercise?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In answer, I closed my eyes and listened, mindful of what feeling came.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThere is excitement,\u201d I said.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

I didn\u2019t post much on this blog last year. (I know, you were devastated.) All my writing time was spent working on my books. But I\u2019m planning on posting more in 2023 (between working on the conclusion to the Descendants of Terene series!), so hopefully we\u2019ll be spending more time together.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThere is intention.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you’re interested in getting the Inner Knight<\/em> for your team, let me know and I’ll get you a discount on bulk orders.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Although it\u2019s a story anyone can enjoy, The Inner Knight: Train and Compete Like a Champion was written for athletes […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4558,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,4],"tags":[11,12,19,53,58,59,106,110],"class_list":["post-1924","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-volleyball","category-writing","tag-billy-allen","tag-book","tag-coaching","tag-lmu","tag-mindfulness","tag-mindset","tag-the-inner-knight","tag-volleyball"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/billyketchallen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1924","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/billyketchallen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/billyketchallen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/billyketchallen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/billyketchallen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1924"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/billyketchallen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1924\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4641,"href":"https:\/\/billyketchallen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1924\/revisions\/4641"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/billyketchallen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/4558"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/billyketchallen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1924"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/billyketchallen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1924"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/billyketchallen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1924"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}